Name: Svetlana Strokanova
Svetlana’s idea of cleaning involves bending over in the tightest maid outfit this side of the Kremlin, then pretending she can’t hear you asking her to stop rubbing her mop on your thigh. She’s been fired from five different jobs for “distracting clients,” but somehow every house she enters ends up filthier than when she arrived.
Laundry? Never done. Floors? Still sticky. Your pants? Magically gone. Svetlana’s resume might say “domestic specialist,” but we all know what kind of work she specializes in. And judging by the number of tips she collects stuffed in her bra, she’s damn good at it.