We probably won't respond, but we might read it while drunk
Want to share your own story of debauchery, degeneracy, or financial ruin? Got a complaint? A compliment? A cease and desist letter from someone we wrote about?
Email us at: [email protected]
Response time: Somewhere between "eventually" and "never"
Everything on this website is satire. If you think we're writing about you specifically, we're probably not, but also maybe we are. If you're considering legal action, consider this: we have no money. We spent it all on bad bets and worse decisions.
All stories are either completely fictional, heavily embellished versions of real events, or things we wish had happened to make our lives more interesting. Names have been changed. Locations have been changed. Events have been changed. Everything has been changed except the emotional truth, which is devastatingly real.
The classic. We'll see it. Probably won't respond. But we'll see it.
We got banned from most platforms. Don't ask.
Actually our preferred method. Very reliable. Very dramatic.
Just think really hard and maybe we'll pick it up.
Yes. Email us. If it's good enough (read: embarrassing enough), we might publish it. We won't pay you. This isn't a job. This is a support group with a website.
"Real" is a strong word. We exist. We have a website. We have content. Whether that constitutes a "company" is a philosophical question we're not prepared to answer.
Real feelings. Real consequences. Possibly fictional details. The line between truth and embellishment is thin, and we cross it constantly.
Do you want to be associated with a website called "Balls Deep International"? If yes, email us. We're cheap. We have no standards.
Because "Moderate Involvement Domestic" didn't have the same ring to it. We commit fully to everything we do, especially mistakes.