Destiny Spreadsheet

"Your expense report has been... reviewed. We need to talk."

Yes, that's her legal name. Destiny legally changed it in 2019 after what she describes as a "spiritual awakening involving VLOOKUP." She runs BDI's finance department with an iron fist wrapped in conditional formatting. She knows what you spent on lunch last Tuesday. She has opinions about it.

Destiny's desk features three monitors, all displaying spreadsheets at all times. When asked why she needs three monitors, she said "one for past, one for present, one for future" and refused to elaborate. She has rejected expense reports for "vibes" and once denied a reimbursement because the receipt "felt dishonest."

She claims to dream in pivot tables and describes her ideal vacation as "two weeks alone with an unaudited ledger." Her laugh sounds like a formula successfully executing. No one has heard it more than twice.