Bambi McSunshine

"Every day is a gift! Some gifts are just... more explosive than others! :)"

Bambi arrived at BDI three years ago and has been relentlessly, aggressively positive every single day since. Her smile has never wavered. Not once. Not during the fire drill. Not during the layoffs. Not when the vending machine fell on Kevin from Accounting. Always smiling. Always.

She greets every visitor with enthusiasm that medical professionals have described as "clinically impossible to sustain." Her desk is covered in motivational posters, succulents named after departed employees, and a concerning number of candles. The candles are always lit. No one has seen her light them.

Colleagues report that Bambi sometimes whispers "everything is fine" to herself when she thinks no one is listening. When asked about her background, she simply says she "emerged" and changes the subject to how GREAT everything is. HR has stopped asking questions.